You are the Only One (Good Wi-Fi on Campus)

Sergey Lazarev mentioned in a lot of his interviews at Eurovision that the staging of “You are the Only One” represented a journey to find “the only one.” Judging simply by the music video, I’ll guess that most people interpreted “the only one” as a significant other. After all, how many Eurovision artists sing about love? This year there were fewer songs about love, but you could probably say about 1/3 to ½, if you tweak the interpretations. “The Only One” doesn’t have to a significant other. Judging by the lyrics, there’s a chance that it could be about connecting to the Internet.

Well time to play T-Rex Run again...

Well time to play T-Rex Run if the Internet doesn’t work…

The uni I go to has two kinds of Wi-Fi. The first one is the typical shite kind everyone complains about: it constantly lags, it takes months to load up a 3-minute YouTube video, and it logs off every 5 minutes (yes I’m exaggerating but you get the point…). Then there’s the second one: it’s still somewhat slow compared to the library’s super-fast Ethernet, but loading times are reasonable (seconds vs minutes) once you’re able to connect and log in to the Internet once, your phone/laptop/insert device that connects to the Web will automatically connect. However, not all buildings on campus have this secure Wi-Fi, and if they do, you have to connect to the system around 8AM (when everyone is still half-asleep). In the particularly nasty case that the “good” Wi-Fi shuts down (e.g. every few months in the dorms), it’s really frustrating. Even if my stuff could connect to the other system, I won’t be able to do anything besides open files that are offline. In that case, the “good” Wi-Fi on campus is the only (usable) Wi-Fi.

Won’t ever give up ‘cause you’re still somewhere out there, nothing and no one’s gonna keep us apart: If I have to do my homework that’s due by midnight and it’s 10pm already (when the library’s computer lab shuts down), I’m not going to accept slow Internet. I will have a good connection, and I’m going to find it.

I’m breakin’ it down but I’m still getting nowhere, won’t stop, hold on: I still can’t find a good location and still have to use 4G on my phone, but I’m going to keep searching.

Thunder and lightning it’s getting exciting; lights up the skyline to show where you are: Okay fine this is probably just a good hook in the song. But let’s interpret “skyline” as “the Wi-Fi bars” on my phone… and lightning is in the electric department.

My love is rising, the story’s unwinding; together we’ll make it and reach for the stars: Once my phone connects and there are 4 bars of signal, I’ll be able to do anything.

You’re the only one; you’re my only one: You’re the only one (good/usable Wi-Fi on campus)

You’re my life, every breath that I take: How many people agree with this?

maslows-wifi

Unforgettable, so unbelievable; you’re the only one, my only one. (Syllable filler fluff; put in some big words with multiple syllables. At least it’s not off the TOEFL list…)

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