RIP 5-for-$1 Goldfish

Whenever someone asks if I have pets, I say that I have goldfish. They’re technically not mine; officially they belong to my grandma. Or maybe I should say belonged, in past tense, because they all died. Again. I was responsible for cleaning the tank; grandma was responsible for feeding them. Unfortunately, the fish were fed too much and died of a) ammonia poisoning, b) not enough oxygen in the water, c) eating waaaaaaaay too much, or d) all of the above. (I pick answer d)

So here’s a small dedication to the 5-for-$1 goldfish that just died today. (Credit goes to Andrius Pojavis for the original lyrics/tune)

I have to tell you something
And you won’t like it — At all
I’ve got to tell you this
And you won’t like it—not at all
I thought it was ‘cause of me
But then I walked in and saw the tank

If you don’t know: Those fish eat too much
First they eat lunch then have second brunch
Since NH3 gas is not good for you
That fish is dead; the others are too

So tell me now
It’s all your fault
It’s too much food, tell me now
Tell me now
‘Cause I walk in and see them corpses float

If you don’t know: Those fish eat too much
First they eat lunch then have second brunch
Since NH3 gas is not good for you
That fish is dead; the others are too

But still you don’t know: Those fish eat too much
First they eat lunch then have second brunch
Since NH3 gas is not good for you
That fish is dead; the others are too.
That fish is dead; the others are too.

rip-fish

So rest in peace, goldfish; we’ll get new fish to remind us of you. And hopefully make sure they don’t die of NH3 poisoning.

If Love was (is) a Crime

It’s been a while that I’ve been at the Pharm, and I swear my coworkers all know me as that one person who can’t stop singing. (It’s either that or the person who gets locked out of the system at least 20 times a shift because of a stupid mis-scan, but let’s leave it at the first one).

One my favorites to sing is Poli Genova’s “If Love was a Crime.” To most of the other coworkers at work it’s just a catchy/radio-friendly song with a slightly cheesy dance (thankfully there’s no footage of me singing in the plant) that they seem to like. To one coworker (which I’ll just call C), it sucks for a very good reason:

As one of three out non-straight people (the two others being me and a coworker “A”), C knows for certain how love is a crime in the USA. Even though the Supreme Court declared marriage equality in all 50 states on 6/26 last year, it’s still not the end of the debate. In 28 states including Michigan it’s still legal for companies to discriminate for sexual orientation, and the same goes for 32 states (also including Michigan) for gender identity. So in the worst case situation, a person could get denied a job, healthcare, maybe even housing, etc., especially in states with religious freedom acts (*glares at Mississippi*). I’ll also throw in that in some cases you could say that love used to be a crime (e.g. Loving v. Virginia, 1967) with interracial relationships. Thankfully all the places I’ve worked at have had a non-discrimination policy, so that’s not an issue at work, so love itself isn’t a crime in this situation. It can, however, lead to crimes. Stuff like what happened on 6/26 this year.

And that’s what happened to C. Long story short (since he’s not telling the full story), C had a significant other for a while. The two were out to very few people, and everyone thought they were friends/roommates/brothers. One day the SO died (most likely from some person slipping something into his drink at the bar), and C’s life fell apart. The death was ruled as accidental and C’s memorial tattoo for the SO got ruined. It’s been almost a year, and it’s taken until now for him to tell the story.

I keep thinking about C’s story and what I should do with my own relationship/orientation (or lack thereof). What if I don’t tell enough people and my SO dies like C’s SO? Thankfully I don’t have to be completely in the closet. I’ve pretty much told everyone I know at school about being ace to the point that this happened on National Coming Out Day:

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Me (wearing an ace flag hat): Hey, no one’s noticed my hat so far today!
Classmate: No, everyone noticed the hat, but no one cares anymore. That would be because you wear that hat ALL THE TIME.

Most people at school have gotten the point: Love is not a crime. But at the same time, I can’t tell my family about the situation and still can’t be out, so it still feels like a crime…

You are the Only One (Good Wi-Fi on Campus)

Sergey Lazarev mentioned in a lot of his interviews at Eurovision that the staging of “You are the Only One” represented a journey to find “the only one.” Judging simply by the music video, I’ll guess that most people interpreted “the only one” as a significant other. After all, how many Eurovision artists sing about love? This year there were fewer songs about love, but you could probably say about 1/3 to ½, if you tweak the interpretations. “The Only One” doesn’t have to a significant other. Judging by the lyrics, there’s a chance that it could be about connecting to the Internet.

Well time to play T-Rex Run again...

Well time to play T-Rex Run if the Internet doesn’t work…

The uni I go to has two kinds of Wi-Fi. The first one is the typical shite kind everyone complains about: it constantly lags, it takes months to load up a 3-minute YouTube video, and it logs off every 5 minutes (yes I’m exaggerating but you get the point…). Then there’s the second one: it’s still somewhat slow compared to the library’s super-fast Ethernet, but loading times are reasonable (seconds vs minutes) once you’re able to connect and log in to the Internet once, your phone/laptop/insert device that connects to the Web will automatically connect. However, not all buildings on campus have this secure Wi-Fi, and if they do, you have to connect to the system around 8AM (when everyone is still half-asleep). In the particularly nasty case that the “good” Wi-Fi shuts down (e.g. every few months in the dorms), it’s really frustrating. Even if my stuff could connect to the other system, I won’t be able to do anything besides open files that are offline. In that case, the “good” Wi-Fi on campus is the only (usable) Wi-Fi.

Won’t ever give up ‘cause you’re still somewhere out there, nothing and no one’s gonna keep us apart: If I have to do my homework that’s due by midnight and it’s 10pm already (when the library’s computer lab shuts down), I’m not going to accept slow Internet. I will have a good connection, and I’m going to find it.

I’m breakin’ it down but I’m still getting nowhere, won’t stop, hold on: I still can’t find a good location and still have to use 4G on my phone, but I’m going to keep searching.

Thunder and lightning it’s getting exciting; lights up the skyline to show where you are: Okay fine this is probably just a good hook in the song. But let’s interpret “skyline” as “the Wi-Fi bars” on my phone… and lightning is in the electric department.

My love is rising, the story’s unwinding; together we’ll make it and reach for the stars: Once my phone connects and there are 4 bars of signal, I’ll be able to do anything.

You’re the only one; you’re my only one: You’re the only one (good/usable Wi-Fi on campus)

You’re my life, every breath that I take: How many people agree with this?

maslows-wifi

Unforgettable, so unbelievable; you’re the only one, my only one. (Syllable filler fluff; put in some big words with multiple syllables. At least it’s not off the TOEFL list…)

Melodifestivalen Hosts selected

It’s been a month since the 2016-2017 Eurovision Season started, and not that much has happened, just the usual:

  • Andorra, Luxembourg, and Liechtenstein are not participating. The Vatican is not participating (what would they send anyway? A rapping cardinal/priest?)

    Ehhhh…let’s just send a new version of My Lovely Horse or something

  • Turkey is still out, despite the possibility of some TRT members thinking about participating sometime in the future. Then again, they essentially said “we’ll see,” which means no (as every person who’s been a little kid knows).
  • Bosnia and Herzegovina is out due to financial reasons (which also isn’t surprising; Deen and Dalal and Co. got to participate through sponsors because BHRT wasn’t going to pay for stuff.)
  • Armenia just launched its national selection Depi Evratesil (“Towards Eurovision”), and a) my computer wouldn’t launch the stream and b) the internet proceeded to crash. (I think that’s a sign from the chem department to study then, considering I just bombed a math exam…)

Otherwise all I say is that a) this country is a mess, b) my life is a mess, and c) pretty much everything is a mess. *Cue Boggie singing that the world is a mess right now*

So instead of looking at the trainwreck that is this world/my life/whatever is going on in the presidential election, let’s look at something a bit nicer for now: Mello.

Not that Mello, this Mello. Also, I much prefer Mountain Dew.

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Anyways , SVT announced that Hasse Andersson,  David Lindgren, and Clara Henry will host Melodifestivalen next year, to be hosted in Göteborg, Malmö, Växjö, Skellefteå (semifinals), Linköping (Andra Chansen), and Stockholm (Final).

For people who don’t watch Melodifestivalen, Hasse Andersson was the old man who was playing the “Swedish Kvinnaböske/a small roundish instrument from the horn family inherited from the Vikings” during Love Love Peace Peace.

hasse-kvinnaboske-llpp

Otherwise he was one of the finalists in Melodifestivalen 2015 that qualified through Andra Chansen. I’ve never seen him do a speaking role, so this should be interesting.

David Lindgren also participated during Melodifestivalen, making the final the three times that he qualified in 2012, 2013, and 2016.

Considering that he also does stage musicals, I’m not that surprised about him having a speaking role this time. Then again, it’s also the same reason I wasn’t surprised that he was trying to look 17 and/or qualify for High School Musical at Mello last year (since HOW MANY 20-year-old characters on Broadway are played by 35-year-olds?)

(FYI, I actually like his songs. I just had a really bad day during Semi 2 at Mello this year and felt disappointed for almost everything…)

And then there’s Clara Henry, who’s one of my favorite YouTubers. Mello-wise she’s hosted aftershow commentary that I’ve never watched, but I really like her to-the-point commentary on random subjects. Given that she’s worked with SVT a few times, she should come off as less awkward than William Spetz at the final last year.

As of so far, that’s all we know about the contest until SVT announces the 28 artists in November, but ESC season is finally kicking off! (Now I just have to make sure I do well on exams…)