American presidential elections can be a complete shitshow. There’s lots of mudslinging between candidates, drinking games made debates, Wikileaks has fueled the drama fire by releasing new information, and sometimes even the Supreme Court gets involved. So much for whatever reality TV people are watching right now; there’s often so much drama that people could get away with watching C-Span (live broadcast of the legislature in action) and claim that they’re watching “reality TV” (or even better: “reality”). Sometimes it’s really overwhelming, and it makes me want to borrow Maraaya’s headphones, tune things out, and focus on the Eurovision world right now. Unfortunately, there’s still no escape, no matter on the blue side or the red side. So let’s just look at Eurovision-y stuff. (I can’t say I’m from the purple side because US politics likes binaries way too much, and apparently the cake is a lie anyways.)
From the Democratic side: split voting
While there is *slightly* less televised drama (cue all the Wikileaks information that just got released about the DNC), one of the most widely complained things about the party is the superdelegate/split voting system. In short, a candidate needs 2383 out of 4765 delegates’ official votes to win the Democratic nomination. Out of the 4765 official votes, 4049 votes are assigned through popular vote (like televoting). The remaining 716 votes come from superdelegates (kind of like jury members), who don’t vote until late July. As of so far, we only have the delegate count from the popular vote as the superdelegates have not yet voted. However, given that the
jury vote superdelegate vote counts for less than 20% of the total vote count, it’s not going to be as crazy as Poland’s jump from last to 8th place.
It’s probably going to be more like the scoring at UMK, where the televote/jury split is 90/10. But given all the background noise that Wikileaks brought up from within the party, someone’s going to get yelled at for corruption in the voting.
From the Republican Side: Ted Cruz’s 17-year-old lookalike, ManuElla’s angry Republican, Slovenia’s infamous in-laws
Republican primary voting is a lot more straightforward; the total delegate count depends on televote popular vote only. Outside of the voting, there are the candidates. For starters, there’s this:
Somehow Sweden managed to send Ted Cruz’s 17-year-old lookalike, who was not the Zodiac Killer. Frans did make all of Twitter blow up when [insert any of the other 11 Melodifestivalen finalists here] didn’t win, and SVT definitely wasn’t sorry, especially after jumping to #1 on Swedish Spotify or placing 5th in the contest.
Otherwise, Slovenia had a lot of fun representing Republicans this year: In February, when there were still enough candidates for the debates to still be fun enough to watch (and make fun of), Slovenia sent ManuElla’s “Blue and Red.”
If the two colors represent the two parties, then the song can be the anthem of an angry Republican performed in the form of a Taylor Swift-style breakup song:
“And you tried to fix me when I wasn’t strong, but you are not a composer; I am not your song”
(And when your party took up the majority of congressional seats, you introduced all this stuff (e.g. Obamacare, 626 marriage equality, etc.), but you’re not in full control of the government, and we’re not going to be manipulated by you.)
“How can I mix red and blue together?”
(How can our two political parties work together, if our beliefs and values are so different?)
“You feel blue and I feel better”
(Well we’re not going to work together, so you introduce your own legislation (that we’re not going to let pass) and we’re going to introduce our own legislation.)
Let’s not forget the obvious point for Slovenia: The country now has (in/famous) in-laws that are taking over the news. And got the Republican official nomination as well.
(But more importantly, while everyone can complain about politics drama, don’t forget to vote. You can’t complain about the results if you’re eligible to vote and you don’t cast your opinion.)